5/9/07
Don’t Be Hatin’ Just ‘Cuz We’re Awesome
Guestwhore Posts
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Jane Copland and Rebecca Kelley are Internet Marketing Consultants at SEOmoz.org, where they bicker, blog, and occasionally do SEO.
Yesterday they chatted via IM (even though they sit about three feet away from each other) about what sort of eye-gouging avoiding posts they could author for Rae’s blog. Here’s what they came up with:
Squishee3: Jane and I decided to post our IM transcript for our guest blog entry for the following reasons:
coplandMj: 1) we are lazy
Squishee3: 2) It would be easier to do it this way
Squishee3: and 3) Because we actually hate each other, and this method requires the least amount of actual physical contact
coplandMj: yeah. she’s pretty awful.
Squishee3: Yep. I am.
Squishee3: Anyway…
Squishee3: we thought we’d bitch–I mean “blog” about how sometimes Jane and I receive not so friendly criticisms on our company’s blog
coplandMj: Sometimes, it seems that we aren’t taken particularly seriously. Whether this is because we’re young, dumb or incredibly pretty, we aren’t sure. But sometimes, we come under fire.
Squishee3: We’re incredibly, incredibly pretty.
Squishee3: Seriously though, we get our share of hate because we haven’t been in the industry for very long but seem to have built up a rather visible profile
coplandMj: Yes, we’re lucky to be working for a highly visible company. SEOmoz has a huge readership, so anyone posting on our blog, whether it on the main blog or in the YOUmoz section, is going to have his or her writing read by a lot of people.
Squishee3: I just think it’s idiotic for morons to whine and post stuff like “You two don’t know anything about SEO. Why would I read your post? I’m a stupid douche bag, and I smell like butt.”
Squishee3: (or something like that)
Squishee3: Jane and I aren’t claiming to be SEO gurus, for crying out loud
coplandMj: I do believe that Rebecca’s taken that quote from a comment thread we had going on a few weeks ago. I was surprised that someone would allow themselves to sound so bitter and resentful on someone else’s blog. I mean, I can sounds like a rude bitch on my own blog, but why would I want to take it elsewhere?
…
Wait…
coplandMj: Where am I?
Squishee3: uhhh…
Squishee3: …but that’s neither here nor there.
coplandMj: I guess my point was that I’d never take a profession or activity that I had a lot of experience with and poo-hoo (i.e. crap all over) newcomers
Squishee3: I don’t understand the animosity or bitterness that arises. If someone is eager and willing to learn about SEO, why would you be an asshole about it? As long as that person is clearly not trying to pretend to be a bigwig hotshot (and we aren’t), then I say no harm, no foul
coplandMj: Yep, when I was hired here, I didn’t blog much at all to begin with. Why? Because I had nothing constructive to say. I was still learning. I write more and more now because I’m gaining experience.
Squishee3: right
Squishee3: and, it’s not like we’re blogging things like “Jane and Rebecca’s 20 Expert SEO Tips.” Most of our posts are opinion-based, so to say we don’t have enough experience to have an effing opinion is pretty stoooopid
coplandMj: There’s no point in writing if you don’t know shit about your subject. I wouldn’t get a job at the Seattle Times and then suddenly decide I was an expert in print journalism
coplandMj: The comment that sparked this discussion was actually on a post where I embed a video of Rebecca and I being interviewed by Mike McDonald of WebProNews. In the video, we’re talking about social media. Yep, Twitter, Digg and StumbleUpon. Since when are we not allowed to have a valid opinion about Twitter, Digg and StumbleUpon?!
Squishee3: I guess not, since we’re just wittle girls splashing around in the deep end of SEO
Squishee3: (we have water wings!)
coplandMj: Quite honestly, I think we have a few things working against us. One, we’re really young. We’re both 23. College graduation was one year ago yesterday for me. Secondly, we have had an easy ride as far as visibility is concerned. The readership of SEOmoz was built long before Becs and JC graced these offices…
Squishee3: we’re also hugely racist
Squishee3: (just kidding)
coplandMj: And we smell pretty bad
coplandMj: However, there is noooo neeeeeeed to be an asshole to us. So don’t, because Rae will spoon out your eyes
Squishee3: Let’s wrap up with some closing thoughts
Squishee3: Um…
coplandMj: 1)
coplandMj: ah
coplandMj: Lisa sucks
Squishee3: Yeah, totally
Squishee3: 2.
coplandMj: …
Squishee3: Rae is scary
Squishee3: Stay on her good side
Squishee3: or she’ll cut a bitch
coplandMj: aand finally..
coplandMj: let me say something!
Squishee3: *sigh* fine
coplandMj: I think too slowly
coplandMj: umm
Squishee3: Your fingers are too slow
Squishee3: We shouldn’t have hired you.
coplandMj: You needed to fulfill the white blond girl quota, remember?
Squishee3: yeah yeah
Squishee3: Anyway, basically, Jane and I are good people
Squishee3: and we’re smart
coplandMj: My final thoughts on the matter are that you shouldn’t be an asshole in the blogosphere. There’s too much assholeness and nastydom floating around online, so keep the bitching to a minimum
Squishee3: (as we bitch about people bitching)
Squishee3: don’t make us sic Rae on you!
coplandMj: sic?
Squishee3: sick?
coplandMj: Smart?
Squishee3: derrr
Squishee3: I say don’t resent people in the industry (unless they’re total asshats). Jane and I love our jobs and are eager to learn SEO. If you don’t want to read our posts or don’t particularly like us, that’s fine, but you don’t have to be a whiny bitch every time we do write a blog entry. Some people actually DO like us, so pissing and moaning about how “little” we know about SEO and about how we’re not worth your time is only going to draw negative attention to yourself.
Squishee3: THE END
coplandMj: Byeee! I love you!
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Becs and JC Mozzer
Related Posts:
The animosity I see in this industry towards ‘noobs’ courtesy of ‘veterans’ reminds me of seniors beating the crud out of freshman behind the stands during the Friday night football game. Or something.
That having been said, ladies, you can all take solace in the fact that your ‘haters’ definitely got stuffed into lockers frequently in high school.
Basically what I got from this is that your 23, hot and eager, and Lisa sucks. Does that wrap it up?
I think you both are wonderful and other than the freakish wad of hair that precedes Rebecca (that is one “b” and 2 “c”s) everywhere she goes you both seem quite normal and smart.
I like Janes social media piece and Rebecca’s hiring process piece but other than that you both are pretty much just fart machines.
“Freakish wad of hair”? That’s no way to talk about Rand Fishkin.
very funny fartwoman
*pfffft*
Are you kidding me? You get to tag team your entry and this is what you come up with? Total crap. I hope you both lose your eyes for this.
You both suck far more than I do.
Whatever Lisa. Unlike you, we have actual work to do. Plus, as much as we would have wanted to spend the entire weekend indoors sweating over what to write (ahem, like you), we have, you know, social lives.
gets popcorn and large size coke (what it was only a quarter more, so shut up) and sits on couch to watch cat fight
Don’t mock my work ethic because neither of you have one. You both sucked and you totally know it.
Lisa how many times have mom and I told you if you don’t have something nice to say don’t say it at all?
Oh wait we’d never say that …
I think Rae would say, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then I raised you right.”
I think Rae would say you’re both a bunch of lazy asses, come here, let me see your eyes.
Hmmm, Jane has posted today whereas Lisa, er…
And they say video games and movies have excessive violence.
Here’s a linkbait idea: Lisa vs. JC or Becs in a boxing match. Or mud wrestling. Damn, now all of you must think I’m a sleazeball and want to see two girls mud wrestling. Oops.
But you’d definitely get more link-love that way.
Don’t make me kick you in the face, feedthebot. Lisa has written two blog entries but has not yet had time to post them. Don’t you worry about me!
I’ll happily go up against Jane in a mud wrestling match. Rebecca has experience with jello wrestling. I’ve seen the pictures.
Hey if we put that on the SMX conference agenda I bet that would be the most popular session!!!
Just a thought: Maybe after you write one long blog entry, you might publish it, then write the second long blog entry.
And I kicked ass at jello wrestling, too.
Have you ever thought about a career in comedy, feedthebot? Because you’re totally on your way.
Becs, I’d so totally take you. I don’t care if you’re from Detroit, I’m from New York.
Backed into corner, trembling like a kitten who doesn’t understand why pretty is hurting it.
Not!
Post something, there is a slight chance that what you post could be of mild interest to me and if so I want to read it before it gets dark.
Let me try and say this as politely as possible.
Quite possibly the most boring self serving piece of shit blog post I have read EVER.
I don’t know pmac, this one is pretty shitty too: http://www.abandonedblog.com/?p=1
don’t know whether I should stand tall and proud, or curl up in the fetal position in the corner because I was the first commenter on the abandonedblog
dude, you are like classy without the “cl”
btw, The above comment was for pmac, not Graywolf
You two don’t know anything about Instant Messaging. Why would I read your IM transcript? Jane is a stupid douche bag, and Rebecca smells like butt.
[...] a really classy guy and would never talk shit about people he didn’t know all that well like Rebecca, who is racist and [...]
>>>dude, you are like classy without the “cl”
If you knew me, you would know that the comment was pure sarcasm.
There’s a simple solution to the smell problem, just take a shower together. That could also work as the Friday SEOmoz video.
[...] a coward hiding behind the alias of JohnyX and rip on our beloved and humble femozzers who are undeserving of such snide remarks. (Could JohnyX be Johny Xantas who we see trolling in a [...]
[...] Don’t Be Hatin’ Just ‘Cuz We’re Awesome [...]
Jane and Rebecca! You guys rock don’t listen to the farts that says anything else. It’s only jealousy speaking! I only have 2 1/2 years experience in SEO and I’m already heading up my department. It’s NOT always about how long you have been in a industry, yesterday I interviewed a guy for a Junior SEO position. He had been working in SEO for 3 years (so longer than me) but he knew diddly squat. Means nothing unless you have brains to go with the years of “experience”. I think you Rebecca are more than qualified to call yourself a professional SEO and Jane you know LOADS about social media. I would totally listen to your advice! You rock!
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